Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Playoffs or Playtime?

Over the last several weeks it has been pretty exciting in the state of Oklahoma when it comes to NBA basketball. Our family really got into the playoffs with the OKC Thunder doing so well and taking the Lakers to the limit. But I also noticed, I guess I should be honest, my wife noticed that even though the Thunder were out of the playoffs our TV seemed to be on more than ever watching all the other games. Now, I'm not saying you should not watch the playoffs. But, I am saying we must be careful what we watch when watching the playoffs. Have you seen some of the commercials that THEY show on TV. My eight year old son should not have to be subject to watching a Victoria Secrets commercial while trying to watch his favorite players do their thing.

Have you ever stopped and thought about who the THEY are that are streaming these things into your home. Let me tell you who THEY are. THEY are those forces out there that do not care about the purity of your heart or your families heart. THEY are the people that are only concerned with making as much money as possible regardless of what it does to your family. THEY are the time stealer's that persuade you into wasting hours in front of an idiot box instead of investing time into the lives of your family. Oh sure, THEY try to tell you that what THEY have to offer is worth your time and concentration. But the truth is the time we waste on the TV is time we can never get back. It is time wasted that you will wish you had when your children are grown and out of the house. It is time you will wish you had when your bride of 50 years is dying in bed and you are praying you could take her place. It is time you wish you had back so your could pass down truth and wisdom to your children so that their heart will remain strong when faced with temptation.

Again, I'm not saying you can't enjoy some time in front of the TV with a good movie or a romantic story but for too many of us the TV has become an idol. And whether we want to admit it or not it has become a god that has dominated our lives.

So let me offer you a suggestion. Change your family tree! Be the first of your family to say, "NO MORE! No more am I going to allow the television to dominate my life or my families life!" For most of the people from my generation (I'm 38 years old) the TV has been a major player in our lives and in our parents lives. So it is a major step to say, "I am going to make a change!" But that is exactly what we must do. Particularly, fathers must be the defender of their realm. Guys, we have to be the change initiator in our families. It is our job. It's our role as leader of the home.

I want to thank my wife, for reminding me how we must protect the heart of our children. I want to thank her for reminding me that if we are going to change our family tree it must start with me. I want to thank her for encouraging me to not be afraid. By the way ladies, this is what a wife does.

So, dads put the remote down and instead of watching basketball pick up a basketball and let your son have a new hero! Dad, show your daughter how a man is to treat a lady by taking her on a date instead of she having to try to figure it out by what she sees on TV. This is changing your family tree.

Don't be afraid to change your family tree!

Paul Kersh
Family Tree Ministries

Monday, May 17, 2010

Movie Night

It was Friday night and it had been a long week so all I really wanted to do was stay home and relax for a little while. So you know what that means, "MOVIE NIGHT!" Have you ever noticed we try to give our need for relaxation a special name so that way we don't feel so guilty for needing it. Hence, movie night was born. On a side note, don't feel guilty for needing some down time. Just don't forget that down town doesn't always mean alone time. But that's another story for another blog.

So this past Friday night was officially dubbed "movie night". So after Ol'dad found a couple of movies at the Red Box. A great invention I might add. I pick them up on my way home from work, along with some very large boxes of candy from the local store. I also brought with me a projector I borrowed from work. This would be the highlight of movie night. Because a 10' x 12' screen on your living room wall is always a hit no matter how you slice it.

After the appropriate pizza had been ordered, delivered and promptly consumed we settle in for a night of excitement, adventure and even a few tears. Movie night was a success! We had had a great time relaxing together. Or at least that's what I thought. I had thought that was all we were doing was relaxing, but it turns out we were doing much more than that. I didn't know the full extent of movie night until two days later as I was tucking my son into bed. He said to me, "Dad, that was really fun watching the movie so big on our wall." I said, " I know, we will have to do it again sometime." That's when he flipped the switch on me. He said, "What I liked most was sitting on the couch with you." Simple words but powerful meaning!

We had set on the couch together lots of times. But those times were not always doing something he wanted to do or watching something he wanted to watch. This time we were doing something together. Still relaxing, still having some down time, but not alone. We were together. And we were touching! As parents we must never forget that our kids need touch. Dad's it is important for us to give a caring touch to our sons. They still need a arm around the shoulder when sitting on the couch watching a movie. Daughters still need to sit on their daddy's lap and be lavished with hugs and kisses. It's the little things that they remember two days later as your tucking them into bed. It's the little things that we do now that will change your family tree.

One day my son and daughter will not remember what movie we watched that night, but they will remember that we had movie night and that it was fun and that it was a time when we were all together. Those are the kind of things that change a family. Those are the things that change a family tree. If you don't want the same old thing, the status quo, the usual for your family than begin chaning your family tree. Maybe one day your grandkids will come to your house and tell you all about movie night and how they got to sit on the couch with dad or mom. That's when you know your family tree will never be the same.

Start changing your family tree!

Paul Kersh
Family Tree Ministries

Monday, May 10, 2010

Road Trip

Anyone else ever have those moments you wish you could hit the rewind button and do what you just did in a whole different way? I do! All the time! Sometimes I feel like the Apostle Paul, and not in a good way. I do the things I don't want to do and I don't do the things I know I should. And so it goes this weekend.

Friday I came home from work and started planning all the things I needed to get done this weekend, especially before any rain were to come in, as it was predicted. Mow the grass, change the oil in the car, do some different repairs on the house, etc... Not once did I stop to think that my wife might want or even need me to go with her on a road trip to see her grandmother, who had not seen our new baby yet. She had this trip planned all week and not once did I consider that I needed to go. She has gone to see her grandmother many times and she didn't need me any of those times, so why would this trip be any different. But it was different! When she asked me what I was going to do when they (my wife and three kids) were gone I replied, "Oh, I've got somethings to do." I thought that would be the end of it. But I was wrong. You know you have really messed up when you can hear it in their voices that you have disappointed them. She said, "OK. I didn't think you would go with us anyway. I've stopped planning around your schedule and just go when it works for the rest of us, because I know you have other things to do." When she said this it was so matter of fact. She didn't seem upset, or angry. It was just the way it was. But that's were the problem was. That it was just the way it was. The disappointment was there and apparently it had been there before.

That's when it hit me! I had messed up in a big way! She was needing me to place her and her desires above my own. Sure I had things to do, but not one of them was going to make a difference in the life of my family. Not one of those things were more important than spending time throwing the baseball around with my son while at his Great Grandmother's house. Not one of those things were more important than seeing the face of my wife's grandmother as my eleven year old daughter carried in the house my one month old daughter and showed her to Granny for the first time.

Those are the things that matter in life! No one will remember how nice your lawn looked or if you maintained your car perfectly when you are lying there on your death bed. My hope is, that when that time comes my family is gathered around me remembering how they felt that they were more important to me than anything else in this world!

Sometimes before we can change our family tree we have to come face to face with somethings that are not always pretty to look at. We have to put our families desires above our own! We have to let them see that they are special and not just assume they know it. Dad's if we don't teach our sons this, they are bound to repeat it.

Dad, don't be afraid to change your family tree! But start now! Time is of the essence. Before we know it our children are up and gone and it will be too late! So look fear in the face and tell it, " You are not going to win this time!" Don't be afraid Dad! Don't be afraid!

Paul Kersh
Family Tree Ministries

Dad, don't be afraid to change your family tree.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Happy Birthday!

Every morning when I log on to my computer I always go and check Facebook. I know it's addictive, but I get to see what's going on with some of my friends around the world. But the one thing that happens everyday is I am bombbarded with birthdays. Everyday is someone elses birthday on my friends list. I see them and think, "I need to wish them a happy birthday." And for some strange reason I feel guilty if I don't wish them all a happy birthday, even the guy I have not seen since grade school, but who found me on facebook. I feel almost obligated to say, "Happy B-Day! Have a great day." That is the only gift I can give the guy from grade school, who I really don't know and who really doesn't know me. But a gift I have given.

As I typed these birthday wishes to a friend from the past this morning I was enlightened to the fact that for those of us who have families have truly been given the best gift ever. What an amazing gift we have been blessed to have each and everyday! We have been given the opportunity to invest in the lives of our family. To train them up in the way they should go! To teach and disciple young minds who long to be like dad or like mom. We get to invest in their daily growth to becoming young men and young women who love the Lord with their whole heart and whole mind! This is an incredible thing that God our Father has placed on us.

So let me be the first to wish you a Happy Birthday! Go home and look your gifts in the eye, hold them in your arms and tell them how thankful you are to be their dad or their mom. Tell the Lord how thankful you are for the gifts He has given you. This is one way you can change your family tree. Always remember that gratitude goes a long way.

Don't be afraid to change your family tree!

Paul Kersh

Family Tree Ministries